Busy busy

Hello Friends:

So sorry that I have been neglecting you. School has been keeping me really busy. Did I mention I have Yoda in my class? Not literally Yoda but this guy is so smart and articulate and makes me feel like a moron. He doesn't try to make me feel like a dumbass, he is just brilliant. I am actually not sure if he is aware of it. I have a strong desire to call him Yoda but that just really would not be appropriate, and this is one of those moments in my life where I actually have to be appropriate. I must behave myself. I am actually doing really go so far, knock on wood. My grades have been perfect so maybe when all is said and done I just might be a Jedi Master too.

I have been leaving the house every day, as per Doctor Bob's orders. It might just be going to the pharmacy, but I am going.

I hope all is well with you.
Love and Light

OMG...what have I done?

Hello Friends:

Yesterday I actually got to take a sneak peek at my course work. I did mention I was attempting to obtain my degree online, right? I mean that is how the sensible agoraphobic would do it, right? Online...what the hell was I thinking? I was looking over what I thought were the things we were covering in upcoming weeks. WRONG...lets try this week. Again I would like to say WHAT WAS I THINKING!

Joy oh Joy, it is so amazing how important you are and how everyone needs you when you are busy.
The people in the house are old enough to make food and should be able to entertain themselves briefly, right? Normally one is glued to his video games and one is glued to some B rated crap on Sci Fi. My child(the gamer) wants to know if he can "help me". Okay realistically when I have to any form of math
 I am going to be trying to pay him to do my home work. For now, go do your own home work. No I don't know what you can eat. Yes you can read in here. I love you too. You want to hug me? I had to send the other one outside to play and he is 45.

So I am a little terrified. Here I say what I want to say. It is my blog. If you don't like my grammar, who the hell cares. I have to friggen use punctuation AGAIN. On purpose and properly. I hate that.

Icing on the cake is when the 45 year old and my Mom were bantering back and forth
"How are you going to skip out from your house?"
"I am going to drop her off at the front door and she is going to walk out of the back."
Banter continues.

I realize this is all in fun. I realize every one loves me and I love every one.
This is why, well one of the reasons I am going to get a degree.
I am not stupid. I am not a fuck up. I CAN do this. I am just really friggen scared right now.

It is simply BEAUTIFUL outside. I am going to sign off for now and try and enjoy some of this weather!

Love and Light

MM

Shout out to Hungary

Such an eclectic group of readers. I have to give my shout out to Hungary,as you are my people too!

I am pretty sure I mentioned I had "applied" to be a part of a group at UWM that is trying to study/cure people with social phobias. Epic FAIL. I am not socially awkward "enough".  I am not sure if this is good or bad, but I will admit it does actually feel pretty good. I am just basically afraid to leave the house. Agoraphobic. They are looking for people who are afraid of people and social settings. After talking to this women very briefly I knew I was not what she was looking for. I am the person that talks to strangers in the grocery store. I am the person who bonds with the staff at the hospital. Heck I had a meeting to go to, and I switched seats to sit by a man who looked like my fake daughters dad. If I have to be out of the house might as well seek comfort from sitting by a man that looks like Stan. Yes when I go some where my heart pounds, I start to shake, I get dizzy, and all kinds of other "wonderment's" but it is not from an underlying fear of people.

Are you still scratching your head and wondering what a fake daughter is? Once upon a time I worked with this gal who had 2 simply amazing beautiful little girls. I have had the privilege to watch them grow up. They watched my son for me when he was little and now I get to watch them be Mommy's.
When Annie stayed with me for a little tiny bit(way too little and tiny) I think she came up with being my fake daughter. It kind of stuck. I kind of like it.

I have been leaving the house almost every day. It has been a work in progress. Some days it is really hard. Some places are really hard. You just got to keep on trying!

Love and Light!




MM

Shout out to Romania!

Good Morning and a happy Friday to you.
I have a Romanian reader.
You are my people.
I am guessing this is going to be my weekend excitement.

I have my Lily today, it is Friday.
She is a little bit "grounded" today. So Mommy asked me not to do anything fun outside of the house.
Really this is not a cop out.
I follow Mommy's rules. I think that is very important.

According to the weather we are supposed to be having some huge snow storm today/tonight.
Gross. This just gives me more of a reason to climb back under my rock.
I was really trying to get back on track.

One of my friends from middle school/high school is going to come and hang out with me tonight.
I am really looking forward to that.Hopefully the snow doesn't put a damper on that.


I need to run. Lily needs me.

Here are a couple new phobias to ponder:

1. Selenophobia: Selenophobia is the term for the fear of the moon.
2. Asymmetriphobia: If you’re afraid of mismatched socks or asymmetrical objects, you have asymmetriphobia.
3. Aurophobia: Most people would be ecstatic to have the chance to find gold, but people who suffer from aurophobia are petrified of it.
4. Ereuthophobia: The fear of red lights is called ereuthophobia.
5. Genuphobia: Knees can cause great irritation and fear in people with genuphobia.
6. Automatonophobia: The fear of human-like figures, like dummies or wax figures, is called automatonophobia.
7. Atephobia: Visiting ancient Greek or Roman ruins would be a nightmare for those with atephobia, or the fear of ruins and old buildings.
8. Aulophobia: Aulophobia refers to the fear of flutes.
9. Dextrophobia: People with this phobia do not like having objects situated to their right.
10. Linonophobia: Though it’s useful, string is the cause of anxiety for people with linonophobia.
11. Papyrophobia: Paper is the cause of great anxiety and even fear in people who suffer from papyrophobia.
12. Domatophobia: One wonders where people with this phobia — the fear of houses and being inside houses — live.

These were taken from nursingdegree.org. Kind of interesting! I am not sure if the links will transfer over, but lots of interesting stuff to read!

Love and Light!

MM