That is Not Iceseptabill
Wait Wait Wait
It’s All I Ever Do
Having a baby brother isn’t so much fun
Your don’t believe me? Well it’s true!
Once upon a time the world evolved around me
Now it evolves around Him
Wait Wait Wait
It’s All I Ever Do
He is gooey and sticky and sometimes he even smells like poo
I really don’t know what Mommy was thinking
I am pretty sure this is her fault
I think me and Daddy would have been happy with a puppy
He is allergic to cats so that idea was out
This is NOT Iceseptabill
What happened to my life?
Once upon a time I was the Princess of the World!
Life was like rainbows and ice cream before this kid was born.
Now my life is like a bowl of endless spinach and I have a little troll following me around!
This is Not Iceseptabill!
Maybe Mommy wouldn’t notice if I traded him for a dog?
Feedback:
Hey Laura,
I enjoyed your poem That is Not Iceseptabill when your originally wrote it, but your revision is better. The addition of, "Life was like rainbows and ice cream before this kid was born.Now my life is like a bowl of endless spinach and I have a little troll following me around!" (Dailey, 2014), was the part I like the best. It adds a description of what a child assumes is the worst thing ever, spinach, and compares it to the terrible little brother she has gained. Also finding out that the child is a girl, gives the character more definition. As a older sister, later she might assume the role of taking care of her brother like a doll baby. Reference Dailey, L. 2014. That is Not Iceseptabill
-Tiffany
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